Attitude, Confess, Guard Your Heart, Jesus in Everyday Life, My Publishing Journey, My Story, Obedience, Pause, Prayer, Surrender to Jesus, Trusting God, When it hurts, work

Take 5: What is Your Underlying Motive?

Has Satan deceived you and robbed you of the gift of work?

Oh he has me!

I was lured in by his lie, “It’s all about me.”

When God called me to this ministry I believed I was 100% responsible for my success or failure. It was my job to “build my platform.” If I didn’t, I wouldn’t get published. Which would make me a failure. A fraud. A nobody. So I followed the movers and shakers in the publishing industry. I took their classes and webinars. I read blog posts and listened to podcasts. I followed their formulas—and still didn’t measure up. And the more I fell short, the more I grasped for success, desperate to “be somebody.” To “be known.” To “be loved and sought after.” To matter.

Truth is, their rubrics and numbers weren’t how I measured my success, but my value. So, I worked long hours. I struggled. I strained. I pushed myself beyond the breaking point. I cried. I screamed. I pushed some more. And then I’d burn out. After a time I would recover and start the cycle over.

What is that definition of insanity again?

Then this January, discouraged and shattered by disappointment, I found myself in my office determined to call it quits. I no longer enjoyed my ministry. I was exhausted and frustrated. Chasing after the wind and grasping at…what? I no longer knew. I no longer cared. I was done. As I moved to stand, God whispered, “Baby. Are you ready to talk yet?”

“I guess.”

I called you to this ministry, so I determine your success—and your value. It’s not determined by the number of your followers or subscribers but by the number of hearts you encourage to chase after Mine. The number of souls you nurture to grown in their faith. The number of lukewarm believers you turn back to their First Love. Adjust your focus, Baby. Look up. It’s about Me. It’s about them. Keep your eyes on Me, I’ll make the rest happen.”

I believed a lie and I dishonored my Savior. I convinced myself I was working for God, but I wasn’t. I was working for me—to compensate for my insecurities.

According to their rubrics and numbers, I still don’t measure up. And that’s ok. To be honest, I’m not sure I want to anymore. I have a new rubric now. And this one is much more liberating.

I don’t know your story. But I believe if your look up to God, He will examine your heart and motives and give you back the joy and pleasure in your work.

Jesus, search my heart and examine my motives. If they aren’t in alignment with Yours, point them out and adjust them back to You. Lord, today I confess…

Blessings

Cheyenne

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8 thoughts on “Take 5: What is Your Underlying Motive?”

  1. Dear My Beloved Sister in Christ Mrs. Cheyenne Olson. Great Preacher and Beloved Teacher. Thank you for your nice and long letter. It is your call story for your ministry, I have read it, it is wonderful story, but you desrve this gift and this service, when God called you to this ministry, you believed that you was 100% responsible for your success or failures, and the more you fell short, the more grasped for success, you pushed yourself beyond the breaking point, Jesus called you to this ministry, so He determine your success and your value, it is not the number of your followers or your subscribes but by the number of kukewarm believers you turn back to their first love. You are now, Jesus girl, Writer, Author, Speaker, Discover the Bible’s vibrant relevance, Wife, Boy mom 4. Thank we read in Matthew 10:1 (And when he had called unto him his twelve disciples, He gave them power against unclean Spirit to cast them out and to heal all manner of sickness and all manner of disease) and said to them ( Go ye therefore and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost, teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you :and Io, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.) (Matthew 28: 19-20) Your heart is inditing a good matter, You speak things which you have made touching the heart of many, Your tongue is the pen of a ready writer. I agree with you in prayer, Jesus search our hearts and examine our motives, if it alignment with you in your Yours. Point them out and adjust them back to You Lord, today we confess. About me I have many testimonies with God since I was child till this moment, and I have some trials in my life, God protected me, and through trials and mishopes, God draws us nearer to Him. Thank Lord Jesus Christ. God bless you my Beloved Sister and Teacher, and your family as well all staff working with you in your ministry. We all fine and in a good health love you and pray for you. You are very very dear to my heart and in my thoughts and mind. You are in my folks mind and heart. Much love. Your Brother in Christ. Mr. Sabry Abdo Elias. Email : sabryabdo524@gmail.com – – – – – – – With my Best regards to your husband and your Son Macron and his girl friend and her mother Kelly and Eve and Andy McGuire. Wish you all a Blessed Day.

    On Tue, 25 Aug 2020, 1:02 p.m. Vibrant Relevance, wrote:

    > Cheyenne Olson posted: ” Has Satan deceived you and robbed you of the gift > of work? Oh he has me! I was lured in by his lie, “It’s all about me.” When > God called me to this ministry I believed I was 100% responsible for my > success or failure. It was my job to “build” >

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Cheyenne, this is such a wonderful post! It’s so easy to get caught up in all of *our* ideas of what success should look like and forget about how God measures our success. Learning to find our value in Him can keep us from falling victim to that hamster wheel of always trying to do and be more. Blessings to you sweet friend!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Amen. I still learning too. And this past year has been a great teacher. The pain was deep and real. But so was the redemption. The redirection. It didn’t happen all at once. But I did with my surrender.

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  4. Amen. We are answerable to God for our faithfulness and obedience to His call, not to every wind the blows in the ministry world. We need to ask, who has God created us to be in our sphere of influence? My ministry will be as unique as He is. I am still learning…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Exactly. We are pushed to do all the things. If we don’t, our calling comes into question. Sadly, this isn’t limited to writers and authors. I’ve heard this from teachers (especially now), pastors, nurses, and other professionals. Even students. Our “mission field” is where God has us and if we’re too busy trying to jump through everyone’s hoops, we won’t look up. We will lose sight of our purpose and forget the calling God planted in our hearts.

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  6. You are so right, Cheyenne. Early on I. My ministry of writing, speaking, and teaching I experienced whiplash from all of the expectations. Follow the herd. Sell things on your website. Offer opt-in giveaways in exchange for email addresses. Podcast. Webinars. Seminars. Live videos. Evergreen content. Ebooks.
    I felt like a circus act with all the hoops.
    We cannot spread ourselves so thin or we will be no good to anyone.
    Follow God.
    Ask him what your ministry will do today.
    Trust him for tomorrow.
    Be faithful.
    And watch Him work.

    Liked by 2 people

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